By The Numbers: Art Of Courtship Edition

When it comes to dating, there’s a lot to be said for the art of courtship.

Over the years, I’ve had the good fortune of dating a variety of men who know what it means to truly woo a woman. In this day and age, that’s no easy feat given how modern mores seem to scoff at the very idea of romance – and imply that being an independent woman is somehow at odds with wanting (and enjoying) the rites of courtship.

During those heady first days and weeks of getting to know a new love interest, I'm a big fan of mixing it up. A combination of spontaneity and planning, of the grand gesture and the little things, goes a long way toward getting off on the right foot romantically speaking. Here are a few of the memorable ways I’ve been wooed – By The Numbers:

Number of men who said it with flowers early on: 5
Number of men whose initial courting tactics included a concert or Broadway show: 5
Number of men who whisked me away on a romantic trip: 3
Number of men who added to my menagerie of stuffed animals: 3
Number of men with whom I’ve done karaoke (and not lived to regret it): 3

My most recent karaoke outing was with hunky cop and Match.com member Rich. He belted out Bon Jovi’s “Dead or Alive,” while I made like Tina Turner and sang “The Best.” Never underestimate the icebreaking effect of warbling after you’ve had a few drinks.

What are some of your top picks for great dates?

By The Numbers: Front Row Edition

Imagine attending more than 700 concerts in your lifetime. Earlier this week, I learned that’s what my friend Cindy’s boyfriend Jason has done (733, to be exact) – which got me to thinking about my own love affair with live music.

Over the years, I’ve had the pleasure of seeing more than 50 concerts, a dozen of which have been my beloved Ricky Martin. Here are some of my most memorable live music moments, enjoyed with and without the opposite sex, By The Numbers:

Number of concerts attended with significant others: 4
Number of Maroon 5 concerts that figured prominently in reconciling with an ex: 1
Number of ‘farewell’ concerts attended of performers who later toured again: 2
Number of times I ended up within the first 20 rows despite having a nosebleed section ticket: 1 (Tina Turner, June 2000)
Number of times I saw Ricky Martin during his 2007 Black and White tour: 4
Number of miles flown to see Ricky perform in Puerto Rico: 3,206

Worth The Trip: Ricky Martin sizzles during his Black and White tour, San Juan, August 2007

I’ve been fortunate enough to see Ricky and some of my other favorite performers (e.g. Bon Jovi, Dave Matthews Band and Tina Turner) multiple times. The band I most want to see but haven't yet -- U2.

Jason has seen U2 five times. I look forward to catching up with him on that front – and, of course, to whenever Ricky hits the concert circuit again.

Opening The Vault: Part Seventeen

After you go away to college, there’s always a readjustment period when you return home. Getting used to being under my parents’ roof again was especially difficult during the summer following my junior year in London.

Thankfully, I had the welcome distraction of my California-based long-distance love Mark (a.k.a Sparky). A visit from Sparky in July left me yearning to see him again.

Given the newness of both my romance and my return from London, Dad had his reservations about me taking a trip to the West Coast. Thankfully, Mom helped convince him that he had nothing to worry about. I now Open The Vault and take you back to August of 1994…

August 8, 1994
New York, NY

Dear Diary,

I commented on the weather and asked Dad about his next game of golf. He smiled as he puffed away on his cigar, knowing I had more than meteorological matters on my mind. As if on cue, Mom came in and asked what we were talking about.

With a voice like butter, Mom began to tell Dad the real reason for our conversation. She was just about to do so when he interjected with--

“I know -- she wants to go to California.”

My heart sank when he added—

“Didn’t we say that she’d done enough traveling for awhile?"

Mom concurred but gently added that this time, I would pay for my plane ticket instead of using frequent flier miles from our family account.

“What are you -- attorney for the defense?” Dad quipped.

California Here I Come: A visit to the West Coast to see Sparky was on my agenda during the summer of 1994

After Mom exited, Dad asked when I was planning to go and where I would be staying (I opted not to tell him I would be staying with Sparky). He reached behind him and pulled out the form that would procure me a free miles-earned airline ticket.

Upon receiving the good news, I couldn’t wait to tell my sweetheart. I left a message for him and later, he called back.

“I want to hear you say it,” he said adorably.

“I’m coming to California!” I exclaimed.

“You’ll be on my turf now,” he said.

“Yeah,” I answered quickly, “But you’ll have to deal with my scruples [about remaining a virgin]!”

* * *

August 12th, 1994

I just spoke to Sparky. He had been trying to reach me all day. I was tickled pink to hear this because I had tried HIM to no avail the night before.

He said he is “very excited” about our relationship and that, since his visit here last month, his thoughts about me are “more of a constant thing.” I know exactly what he means.

* * *

While Sparky remained on my mind and I looked forward to seeing him on his ‘turf,’ I had other things to contend with on the local front – including a well-intentioned Granola-type beau who had me missing my California love even more.

Coming up…Tina Turner’s return to NYC and farewell festivities for a beloved exiting colleague and friend.