Sunday, September 13, 2009

The Inevitable Reprise

After you break up with someone, it often happens that -- voluntarily or not -- your paths end up crossing again.

One of my favorite books, The Heartbreak Handbook, refers to this as the inevitable reprise. I’ve been down that road many times, reconciling with an ex-boyfriend or briefly revisiting the spark that ignited in the first place. When I caught up with a summer fling for drinks this weekend, I couldn’t help thinking about the allure of the old flame -- and how fleeting it is.

He said he’s missed me since I broke it off between us three weeks ago. Though the chemistry between us was still there, so were the reasons I chose to walk away. As he spoke of his difficult work schedule and inability to express his feelings, I found myself feeling very grateful that I’m no longer dealing with either anymore.

Like the other exes I’ve reconnected with, my fling reminded me how fortunate I am to still be single and not have settled for less than what I’ve deserve. Closure is a wonderful thing.


Hannah said...

so right melissa! a couple months ago, an ex called me two years after a breakup and wanted to get back together. it took him two years to realize what a huge mistake it was for him to walk away, but you know what? all the reasons he was wrong for me then were incredibly evident in that call. he hadn't changed, and while i was heartbroken after that breakup, i also had reassurance that it was the right thing for me not to be with a dramaking. good for you! xoxoxo

Melissa said...

Thanks Hannah! It is probably the best part of a breakup -- realizing how lucky you are to have avoided ending up with the wrong person. Fate has a way of helping you have this epiphany, even though it sometimes take a step backward to take two giant ones forward! XOXO

Anonymous said...

Go, forget me - why should sorrow, O'er that brow a shadow fling? Go, forget me - and to-morrow, brightly smile and sweetly sing. Smile - though I shall not be near thee; Sing - though I shall never hear thee.
Charles Wolfe