Not too long ago, I blogged about finding out secondhand that an ex-boyfriend is getting married
(http://melissa-singlegalinthecity.blogspot.com/2008/07/post-breakup-etiquette-moving-on.html). Last night, I came home to find an email from my old flame Shawn informing me that he’s engaged.
Given that his wedding is just a few weeks away, and that I had already learned of the nuptials from his best friend, I was surprised to receive Shawn’s missive. I truly appreciated him wanting to tell me directly – though I found it a bit strange that he also directed me to his wedding website. To paraphase Miss Manners, forwarding event details to an uninvited guest is, well, tacky.
That said, I’m willing to give Shawn the benefit of the doubt. Just as I’ve learned there’s no linear route to happily ever after, so have I come to realize that there are no hard and fast rules when it comes to post-breakup communication. I think there are so many minefields along the way to moving on, the occasional misstep is virtually unavoidable.
Shawn and I shared some great times that I'll always remember fondly. Sadly, we also share something tragic – we both lost each of our beloved parents to cancer. As I continue to find tremendous comfort in family, friends and a city that I adore to distraction, I am genuinely happy that my ex has found his own way of moving forward.
Like I’ve often said, closure is a wonderful thing.