As I enjoyed mushroom soup and crab and avocado salad (complemented by a smooth glass of Chardonnay), Jean and I talked about the allure of the blogosphere -- she’s got a fabulous idea for a new culture-themed blog -- and the perks and pitfalls of single hood.
We both agreed that New York knows how to deliver an array of non dating-related distractions. The challenge? Finding commitment-minded males in this urban playground.
While trading Valentine’s Day horror stories, Jean shared with me her most recent one -- receiving socks from her boyfriend.
Apparently, he didn’t want to give her a gift that implied too much about his feelings. Mission accomplished and time to move on, Jean decided. Thoughtless, overexplained gifts -- when paired with a pattern of thoughtless, inattentive behavior -- are definitely a deal breaker.
Speaking of deal breakers, I shared with Jean my experience that they usually emerge early on. In an attempt to brush past the commitment issues I’ve often been (rightfully) accused of having, I’ve tended to ignore these initial red flags. And every single time, they’ve ended up contributing to why a relationship didn‘t work out.
Lesson learned -- trust your instincts. Or as Oprah and my wise, late mother used to say, when in doubt, don’t.
Up next…celebrity sightings at my second Fashion Week stint and being a first-time engagement party guest.