Friday, May 1, 2009

The Extremes Of Online Dating

During a recent email exchange with some of my friends, we found ourselves comparing notes on the vagaries of online dating.

While online dating memberships are up (according to the New York Times anyway), it seems to be a case of quantity over quality these days.

"It's like all the men are picked over," says galpal LK. "And I don't want to pick from this nudnick patch."

Like, for example, the JDate guy who told her he’s decided to never eat out again because it’s bad for your health – but would she like to go for a walk?

It’s also been slim pickings for my friend AC since signing up with the site about a month ago.

"Not a single non-mutant guy has contacted me," she says. "And it turns out the one almost normal guy I ‘clicked’ with dated my best friend."

I, meanwhile, reiterated my biggest pet peeve -- men who are more interested in endless emailing, texting and phone tag than meeting in person.

At the other end of the spectrum, a guy recently bordered on stalking after I responded to his email.

The next day, he left me a voicemail in which he called me "sweetie" and "honey" several times, and then proceeded to send half a dozen text messages (signed XO), one of which said—

"Your blue eyes melt me."

A bit much considering we’ve never met.

AC is canceling her subscription to Jdate -- and exiting too. I’ll be doing likewise soon. Because when it comes to tilting the dating odds in your favor, nothing beats connecting with the opposite sex face to face.


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Daryl Campbell said...

"Your blue eyes melt me."

Yikes. I agree with you nothing is going to beat a face to face meeting. But I think the two way webcam (or whatever they call it) is waiting in the wings to play a more prominent role when in comes to the cyber.

Tina B. Tessina "Dr. Romance" said...

Melissa, I love this post. I've been advocating F2F meeting since my book, The Unofficial Guide to Dating Again came out in 2003. I'd love to chat about dating in general.

Tina B. Tessina, PhD "Dr. Romance"